Cragmaw Castle Altercation

The Cragmaw Castle Altercation, also known as 'The Great Sexual Misconduct of Cragmaw Castle', is an iconic event which occurred during the fourth session of the Lost Mine of Phandelver campaign, set in the Velmaverse continuity.

It began after the party were investigating the many goblins in the area surrounding the town of Phandalin, leading them to the ruins of Cragmaw Castle. After a small battle outside of the castle, the party decided to take a long rest in the south west tower. However, Gogdor and Seranas went to the north west tower to investigate whilst the others were sleeping. During the investigation, Gogdor tried to hold the rogue's hand, though Seranas wasn't having any of this and shrugged him off. Gogdor, now slightly insulted after a woman rejected him, tried to grab her.

This is when Gogdor knew, he fucked up...

Seranas, now in her own rage, attacked Gogdor until seeing that the half-orc wouldn't retaliate and so stormed off back to the southern end of the castle, where the rest of the party were sleeping. The half-orc, now in a panic, knew that she was gonna come back and so he barricaded himself in the north room using the beds to block the entrance. Seranas came back alongside Durnehviir and began to break the door down. Gogdor tried his best to hold the door but to no avail they broke through. Once inside, they took Gogdor to the ground and there Seranas cut his phallus off. Skeldar and Omniscidor heard the fight and came to investigate. In reaction, Skeldar came to Gogdor's defense and protected him from further abuse whilst Omniscidor regrew Gogdor's genitals with healing magic. Whilst the argument was eventually sorted, Skeldar and Gogdor decided to try and leave (and for some reason Seranas too). However, Durnehviir and Omniscidor would find that the other residents of the castle had been alerted due to the argument and so were attacked.

At the same time, the tiefling and the half-orc were at the entrance until suddenly there was a flash of light. Omniscidor's God hovered above them, stating that there had been too much conflict and that both Gogdor and Seranas were at fault (RoxyVelma's way of trying to calm the table down using some good old divine intervention). She first punished Gogdor, stating that either he dies there, or is forced to have a sex change. Skeldar strongly opposed Gogdor from becoming a woman, thus the God used her divine slap on the tiefling, however this did not stop him from him telling her to "fuck off" and so he only stopped until he was at 1HP. Gogdor accepted and so willingly became a female half-orc as his punishment. The God next judged Seranas, making her pick from the Deck of Many Things, and thus randomly chose the card 'Flames'. After this, the God told them to go back inside and help Durnehviir and Omniscidor, as they had just found the kidnapped dwarf Gundren Rockseeker.

Whilst the party were eventually successful in saving their small benefactor, the event would never be forgotten by the adventurers (and the players, whom learnt to never try and have a relationship with another member of the party ever again). It is remembered by the original party and even known to the majority of the League of Mothers as an iconic event.

[ RoxyVelma - The League would like to announce that this event was a falsehood spread by some players that have since been removed and any indication to the otherwise is considered a direct attack on the League and will be treated as such.]